Falling in love - how it feels and how to know if it's reciprocated

Falling in love is a big word - and a feeling that can trigger so much at once. For some, it feels like floating on a pink cloud. For others, it feels confusing, vulnerable or even painful. Maybe you can't quite figure out what you're feeling or how to put it into words. And that's perfectly normal. You don't have to be on top of everything to take your feelings seriously.

At headspace, we're always ready to talk to you about what's difficult - also when it comes to falling in love. Maybe you're not sure if you're in love at all, because what exactly is love? Or maybe you're heartbroken, have been rejected, have given a rejection - or are in a completely different place. In this article, you'll get advice on how to understand the feeling and learn more about what you're feeling.

Falling in love can feel like a euphoria of emotions. When the feeling is reciprocated, you can experience joy,
Lightness and a feeling that everything is getting a little more exciting. But falling in love can also hurt, especially if you don't know if the other person feels the same way - or if you get rejected.

A classic sign is that the other person is very much on your mind. Falling in love can be understood both
Emotionally and biologically. Emotionally, you may feel a strong sense of joy when the person pops into your head and you may become more distracted, find it hard to concentrate or lie awake because your mind is racing. Biologically, falling in love is all about brain chemistry and how the body reacts in the form of blushing, sweaty hands, palpitations and the so-called “butterflies in the stomach”. It's not something you can just control - it's the nervous system that reacts when emotions are
Intense. And there's nothing wrong with that.

Falling in love is a combination of thoughts, feelings and bodily reactions that occur simultaneously. And sometimes it can be hard to figure out what you're really feeling, why you're feeling it and to whom.

Falling in love is not a test you can pass or fail. Some feel it like a bang, others like a
Slow heat. You can be in love without experiencing all the “classic signs” and you can experience
There are many signs without it necessarily being infatuation. Emotions don't follow rules - they arise in what you
are in and what you have with you.

When you're in love, the relationship can bring a certain anticipation and excitement. You may crave contact and closeness, and you notice little signs of romantic chemistry. A message can feel like a little kick. You may also find that you become more concerned about when you'll see each other again, what the other person is thinking and how he/she is feeling.

The other person can come to occupy a lot of your thoughts - almost as if your world takes on a new center. It can feel wonderful and intense, but also overwhelming. Many people also feel infatuation in their body before their mind: nervousness, anxiety, high energy or racing thoughts. Sleep and appetite may change because the body is “on overtime”. Nervousness can be a mixture of joy, excitement and uncertainty - and this is completely normal.

Being in love can be vulnerable, especially if you don't know if the feelings are reciprocated. You may feel insecure, shy or afraid of rejection. You may also be nervous about the other person's reaction and therefore hide your feelings. These can be signs that you are Secretly in love.

You don't always decide who you fall in love with. A crush can happen without you planning it. If you carry the feeling alone for a long time, it can grow bigger in your head, making it even harder to figure out what to do.

There's no one right way to go about it, but putting your feelings into words when you feel ready can help. You can start small by showing interest, seeking more contact or saying something simple and honest. Sometimes it's also helpful to say it out loud to a friend first. Sharing it can give you peace of mind - and you can get support on how to handle the situation.

It's perfectly normal to have doubts about whether what you're feeling is love. If you don't feel the desire for physical or emotional closeness, it can mean several things. Sometimes you're fascinated by a person without your body and emotions following. Other times, the feeling is more of interest, admiration or curiosity - and that's not wrong. It could also be that you're really looking for a close friendship and not a romantic relationship.

Maybe you think more about the idea of being in love than the person themselves. For example:

• who you think he/she is
• who you hope he/she is
• how you imagine it could feel together

Falling in love can make you vulnerable if your fantasy is more important than reality. Some people feel pressure - perhaps because many around them have a boyfriend or girlfriend or more and more people are starting to have a boyfriend or girlfriend in their social circle. Or maybe you have a feeling that you should be in love with a cute person you're dating. Feelings can't appear on command. If you try to force a crush, you might end up playing a role in the relationship instead of feeling what you really feel, and you'll end up confused.

You're not doing anything wrong by having doubts. On the contrary, doubt can be a sign that you're trying to figure out what you really feel, which requires peace and time, not pressure.

Many people find that love can be complicated. Maybe it's because you don't know if you're in love. Maybe you're in love with a friend or someone of the same gender. Maybe the situation feels “forbidden” or difficult - for example, if it's your friend's older brother, your friend's sister, your friend's boyfriend or someone you feel you “shouldn't” be in love with.

When falling in love is complicated, there can be many considerations, thoughts and emotions at play. But that doesn't mean it's impossible to find your way. It may just take more time, honesty and support to figure out what's good for you.

Falling in love can come quickly and intensely - or slowly and stealthily. Both are normal. It's also normal if you haven't fallen in love yet. For example, it can be due to:

• you haven't met the right person yet
•  you feel emotions more slowly
•  You've been focusing on other things in life
•  You need a safe environment for a crush to blossom

There's no deadline for falling in love and no recipe to follow. Some get more energy, others become quieter. Some lose their appetite, some don't. Some feel it mostly in their mind, others in their body.

Signs of infatuation can be, for example:

• that you long for the other person and miss them when you're not together
• that you feel calm and warm when you think of the person
• the feeling is overwhelming and can be hard to let go of
• a friendship suddenly feels different and you get butterflies in your stomach

Falling in love can happen in many situations and there is no one right way to fall in love. The most important thing is to feel and take your feelings seriously.

Love can be difficult. It's normal to have doubts about how you feel, how to take the next step or how to move on after a breakup. Talking to someone, writing down your thoughts or seeking outside support can help.

At headspace, we're ready to listen to your thoughts, feelings and frustrations. We can help you find words for what's bothering you and create a space where you're not alone. You can always Book a call With us.

Der er ofte mange spørgsmål forbundet med at være forelsket. Vi har samlet vores svar på de oftest stillede spørgsmål, når det handler om at være forelsket:

Forelskelse følger ikke faste regler. Den kan ramme som et brag eller vokse langsomt. Typiske tegn kan være lyst til nærhed, intens optagethed af den anden og en følelse af spænding eller håb. Du kan også blive nervøs, få tankemylder og opleve ændringer i søvn eller appetit.

Kroppen kan reagere med rødmen, svedige hænder, hjertebanken og “sommerfugle i maven”. Forelskelse kan føles som en indre uro blandet med glæde og spænding. Det kan også være svært at gennemskue, hvad du føler, fordi både hjerne og krop er i gang på samme tid.

Giv det tid, og lær den anden person at kende i praksis. Vær nysgerrig, søg kontakt, og læg mærke til, om I har det godt sammen. Når du føler dig klar, kan du vise din interesse med små tegn eller sige det ærligt på en enkel måde. Og hvis det ikke er gengældt, gør det ondt – men det betyder ikke, at kærligheden er væk. Den findes stadig, selvom det ikke blev denne gang.

Kærlighed kan mærkes som ro og varme – det kan være en følelse af tryghed, at blive set og hjemme hos en anden. Den viser sig ofte i hverdagen som omsorg, lyst til nærhed og et ønske om at være der for hinanden, også når livet er svært.